Random joke from this category
Two wives were airing their troubles:
"I'd like to get a divorce," said the first.
"My husband and I just don't get along."
"Why don't you sue him for incompatibility?" asked the second.
"I would if I could catch him at it," replied the first.
Do you know why single women can't fart?
→ Because, they don't get assholes untill they get married.
Scientists have just discovered something that can do the work of five men: a woman.
Why did God create man first?
→ So he wouldn't have to be told how to do it.
If your wife comes out of the kitchen to whine at you, what have you usually done wrong?
→ Made her chain too long.
What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?
→ Nothing, you told her twice.
A married man thought he would give his wife a birthday surprise by buying her a bra. He entered a ladies shop rather intimidated, but the girls took charge to help him.
"What color?" they asked. He settled for white.
"How much does it cost?" he asked. "Twenty dollars."
"Very good," he thought. All that remained was the size, but he hadn't the faintest idea.
"Now sir, are they the size a pair of melons? Coconuts? Grape fruits? Oranges?"
"No," he said, "nothing like that."
"Come on, sir, think. There must be something your wife's bust resembles."
He thought long and hard and then looked up and said, "Have you ever seen a Spaniel's ears?"
- Husband: I don't know why you wear a bra, you've got nothing to put in it?
- Wife: You wear briefs, don't you?
- She: What do you love most, my natural beauty or my body?
- He: Your sense of humor.
- She: What do you love most, my natural beauty or my body?
- He: Your sense of humor.
