Dumb Jokes — best jokes

A Dutchman, a German and a Belgian are planning to walk in the desert.

The Dutchman says: "I'll bring an umbrella for the shade when it gets too hot."

The German says: "I'll bring some sunglasses. This sun can really destroy your eyes!"

The Belgian remains silent.

Next day, the Dutchman and the German are astonished. "What's that?" they both shout. The Belgian answers: "It's a car door. Now I can open the window when it gets hot..."

One day a Blonde and a Brunette were driving through the country..

The Brunette noticed a woman over in a field of wheat rowing in a kayak.

The Blonde then noticed also and the Brunette asked her "Why is she in a boat out in a field of wheat? There is a lake right down the road!"

And the Blonde replied... "Want me to swim out and tell her?"

A blonde girl goes into a hair salon and she's wearing earphones connected to her walkman.

She tells the hair stylist to cut her hair but NOT to take off her earphones. He had to cut around it. But, he thought it would look really stupid if he didn't cut under her earphones so he picked them up and lifted them slightly.

Suddenly, she fell to the ground, dead. The hair stylist picked up the ear phones to see what she had been listening to and a recorded voice was saying "Breathe In, Breathe Out. Breathe In, Breathe Out."

Why are dumb blonde jokes one liners?
→ So men can understand them.

Is that your head or is your neck blowing a bubble?

Don't let your mind wander too far. It is too little to go out alone!

What's better than winning 4 gold medals at the special olympics?
→ Not being retarded!

You're so stupid, you got locked in a grocery store and starved!!

There are three guys who are good friends. One is an American, one is Polish, and one is Italian.

They are driving together one day when they get into a car accident. They all die and float up towards the gates of Heaven. When they get there, an angel who tells them they are all on the border of Heaven and Hell. As a result, they have the choice to either ask a question of the angel or be asked a question. If they answer correctly, or if the angel answers incorrectly on their question, they will pass into Heaven.

The Italian guy goes first. He tells the angel to ask him a question. The angel says, "How many grains of sand are there in the world?" The Italian guy says, "Um, four trillion?" and falls straight to Hell.

The polish guy goes next and wants the angel to ask a question. The angel says, "How many drops of water are there in all of the world's oceans?" He says, "Uh, ninety-eight billion?" and also falls straight to Hell.

Finally, it's the American's turn. He tells the angel he will ask the question, but he needs a pencil and paper. The angel snaps his fingers and it magically appears. The American proceeds to take the paper, makes hundreds of holes in it with the pencil and farts through it. He then asks the angel, "Which hole did my fart go through?" The angel replies, "That's easy," and points to a hole. The American says...

"No, it came out of this one!" and points to his butt, and then goes to Heaven.

What did the blonde say when she saw the YMCA sign??
→ LOOK!!! They spelled MACY's wrong!!!!