Computer Jokes — best jokes

- Teacher: Look at the state of the school computer. I want that screen cleaned so I can see my face in it!

- Pupil: But then it will crack and we won't be able to use it at all.

- Pupil: In other schools, pupils get a choice of computers to use.

- Teacher: You get a choice her, too. Use the one we've got or don't use any at all.

- Mum, Mum, Dad's broken my computer!

- How did he do that?

- I dropped it on his head.

- I've been sitting at this computer for hours and I haven't seen a single website.

- That's because you're supposed to sit facing the screen.

- I've been on my computer all night!

- Don't you think you'd be more comfortable on a bed like everyone else?

How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out?
→ Hide their trainers.

- Helpline? I've just pushed a piece of bacon into my disk drive!

- Has the computer stopped working?

- No, but there's a lot of crackling.

- Customer: I think I've got a bug in my computer.

- Repairman: Does your computer make a humming noise?

- Customer: Yes.

- Repairman: Then it must be a humbug!

- Computer helpline?

- Everytime I log onto the seven dwarfs website my computer screen goes snow white....

- Do you turn on your computer with your left hand or your right hand?

- My right hand.

- Amazing! Most people have to use the on/off switch.