Computer Jokes — best jokes

What do you call someone who spends 24 hours a day on the Internet?
→ Anything you like, they're not listening to you anyway.

- Teacher: What are the four elements?

- Pupil: Fire, Earth, Water and the Internet.

- Teacher: What do you mean the Internet?

- Pupil: Well, Mum says that whenever I'm on the Net, I'm in my element.

- Teacher: Don't forget to check the Internet if you have trouble with your homework questions.

- Pupil: It's not the questions I have trouble with, it's the answers.

- So what exactly can I learn on the Internet?

- Anything you like - it can even teach you to talk like an Indian.

- How?

- See? It's working already.

- Since you've discovered the Internet, you don't pay any attention to me!

- Who said that?

- I use the internet to tell me what the weather's like.

- How do you do that?

- I carry my laptop outside and if it gets wet, I know it's raining!

- I see you've got your bill for using the Internet

- Yes, and my dad's really going to get the hump!

- I never thought that the Internet was very useful, but now I've changed my mind.

- Let's hope your new one works better then the one you had before.

- I hope you're not one of those pupils who spends all day on the Net and doesn't get any exercise.

- Oh, no, miss, I often sit around watching TV and not getting exercise either.

- I hear you've been tracing your ancestors on the internet...

- Yes - and it's a mammoth task!