Comedian Jokes — best jokes

Delivering a speech at a banquet on the night of his arrival in a large city, a visiting minister told several anecdotes he expected to repeat at meetings the next day.

Because he wanted to use the jokes again, he requested the reporters to omit them from any accounts they might turn in to their newspapers.

A cub reporter, in commenting on the speech, ended his piece with the following: "The minister told a number of stories that cannot be published."

Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
→ Samson. He brought the house down.

Which rabbit is a famous comedian?
→ Bob Hop.

How many absurdist/surrealist comedians does it take to screw in a light bulb?
→ November.

"The trouble is," said the entertainer to the psychiatrist, "that I can't sing, I can't dance, I can't tell jokes, I can't act, I can't play an instrument or juggle or do magic tricks or do anything!"
"Then why don't you give up show business?"
"I can't - I'm a star!"

- Clown: Why are you wearing such a large shirt?

- Second Clown: I always perform in the big top.

What's blue and sings alone?
→ Dan Ackroyd.

Why do primates do so well in show biz?
→ Put any Ape in the spotlight - and monkeyshines!

Why did the actor fire his Gorilla agent?
→ The big Ape kept wanting to take more than a 10% bite!

Did you hear about the ghost comedian?
→ He was booed off stage.