Science — most viewed jokes

What do you call a tube with a degree?
→ A graduated cylinder.

Why did the alien phone home on his mobile?
→ Because it was so ET!

How many archaeologists does it take to change a light bulb?
→ Three. One to change it while the other two argue about how old the old one is.

What goes dot, dot, dash, squeak?
→ Mouse code!

Why did the idiot have his sundial floodlit?
→ So he could tell the time at night!

An astronaut in space was asked by a reporter, "How do you feel?"

"How would you feel," the astronout replied, "if you were stuck here, on top of 20,000 parts each one supplied by the lowest bidder?"

I've just discovered a method for making wool out of milk!
→ But doesn't that make the cow feel a little sheepish?

At the South Pole by Anne Tarctic

Titus was on a Knoxville elevator with several other people. As the elevator moved up, he stared at the small fan revolving slowly in the elevator ceiling.
"It's amazing," he said to the other people, "that such a small fan could lift all these people!"

What's gray, squeaky and hangs around in caves?
→ Stalagmice!