Science — most viewed jokes

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead, all working for NASA, were trying to figure out where to go on the next trip.

The brunette said, "We should go to Mars."

The redhead said, "We should go to the Moon."

The brunette and the redhead sat there arguing for a while. Suddenly, the blonde shouts, "Stop arguing! I know where the next expedition should be to ... the Sun!"

The brunette and the redhead looked at each other and started laughing. The brunette finally said, "You can't go to the Sun. You would melt or burn up before you even got close!"

The blonde said, "DUH... Not if you go at night!"

What is chemistry's greatest achievement?
→ Artificial blondes!

Here is a list of the ways professors here at the American University grade their final exams:

Dept Of Statistics: All grades are plotted along the normal bell curve.

Dept Of Psychology: Students are asked to blot ink in their exam books, close them and turn them in. The professor opens the books and assigns the first grade that comes to mind.

Dept Of History: All students get the same grade they got last year.

Dept Of Religion: Grade is determined by God.

Dept Of Philosophy: What is a grade?

Law School: Students are asked to defend their position of why they should receive an A.

Dept Of Mathematics: Grades are variable.

Dept Of Logic: If and only if the student is present for the final and the student has accumulated a passing grade then the student will receive an A else the student will not receive an A.

Dept Of Computer Science: Random number generator determines grade.

Music Department: Each student must figure out his grade by listening to the instructor play the corresponding note ( and - would be sharp and flat respectively).

Dept Of Physical Education: Everybody gets an A

On her annual visit to another planet, an old lady turns to the cabin steward and says, "I hope this spaceship doesn't travel faster than sound."

"Why?" replies the cabin steward.

"Because my friend and I want to talk, that's why."

A neutron walks into a bar, and asks for a drink.

The bartender serves it up, and the neutron asks, "Hey - how much?"

Bartender replies, "For you - no charge!"

After much research and millions of dollars, our scientists have discovered the secret ingredients to Viagra!

VIAGRA INGREDIENT LIST: (TopSecret!)

• 3% Vitamin E
• 2% aspirin
• 2% ibuprofen
• 1% Vitamin C

...and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . ...92% Fix-A-Flat!

Why does NASA hire peroxide blondes?
→ They're doing research on black holes.

Why did the alien phone home on his mobile?
→ Because it was so ET!

What is a double-blind study?
→ Two orthopaedists reading an electrocardiogram.

An 8th grade boy was doing some research for his career report at school. He asks his dad, "Father, how many wildlife biologists work for the Federal Government?"

The honest father replies, "Oh, I would say at least half of 'em."