Police Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why don't more dinosaurs join the police force?
→ They can't hide behind billboards.

Did you hear about the calendar thief?
→ He got 12 months; they say his days are numbered!

Who is the strongest thief?
→ A shoplifter.

- Criminal: Why don't you hire these twins for the robbery, boss?

- Criminal Boss: I'm afraid of a double-cross.

Why do pens get sent to prison?
→ To do long sentences!

Who was the world's greatest thief?
→ Atlas, because he held up the whole world!

Little Johnny's class were on an outing to their local police station where they saw pictures, of the ten most wanted men, tacked to a bulletin board. On the way out of the police station Little Johnny said to the officer, "it was so nice of you to put my daddy's picture up there."

When did the criminal get smart?
→ When the judge threw the book at him.

A police officer was escorting a prisoner to jail when his hat blew off.

"Shall I run and get it for you?" asked the prisoner obligingly.

"You must think I'm daft," said the officer.

"You stand here and I'll get it."

- Judge: You claim you robbed the grocery store because you were starving. So why didn't you take the food instead of the cash out of the till?

- Burglar: Your Honour! I'm a proud man, sir, and I make it a rule to pay for everything I eat.