Gender Jokes — most viewed jokes

Three gay guys were all in a car crash and died. All three guys were cremated.

Their boyfriends were talking about what they were going to do with the ashes.

The first boyfriend said I am going to sky dive and spread his ashes in the sky because that's what he liked. The second guy said I am going to spread my boyfriend's ashes in the sea because it's what he liked.

The third guy said I'm going to put my boyfriend's ashes in a bowl of chili so he can rip through my ass one last time!!

A young man, in the course of his college life, came to terms with his homosexuality and decided to "come out of the closet." His plan was to tell his mother first; so on his next home visit, he went to the kitchen, where his mother was busying herself stirring stew with a wooden spoon. Rather nervously, he explained to her that he had realized he was gay. Without looking up from her stew, his mother said, "You mean, homosexual?" "Well...yes." Still without looking up: "Does that mean you suck men`s penises?" Caught off guard, the young man eventually managed to stammer an embarrassed affirmative; whereupon his mother turned to him and, brandishing the wooden spoon threateningly under his nose, snapped: "Don`t you EVER complain about my cooking again!"

What's a famous saying at a gay bar?
→ May I push in your stool.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
→ lick-a-lot-a-pus

What are the three fastest means of communication?
→ Internet Telephone Telawoman!

Top nine reasons computers must be male:

• They have a lot of data but are still clueless.
• A better model is always just around the corner.
• They look nice and shiny until you bring them home.
• It is always necessary to have a backup.
• They'll do whatever you say if you push the right buttons.
• The best part of having either one is the games you can play.
• The lights are on but nobody's home.
• Big power surges knock them out for the night.
• Size does matter

A homosexual walked into a delicatessen and asked the shopkeeper for a large knob of salami.

"Would you like it sliced, sir?" the shopkeeper asked politely.

"What do you think I am?" replied the fag, "...a money box!"

How do you make a gay baby cry?
→ Take the pacifier out of his ass.

At a dinner party, several of the guests were arguing whether men or women were more trustworthy. "No woman," said one man, scornfully, "can keep a secret." "I don't know about that," huffily answered a woman guest. "I have kept my age a secret since I was twenty-one." "You'll let it out some day," the man insisted. "I hardly think so!" responded the lady. "When a woman has kept a secret for twenty-seven years, she can keep it forever."

Lesbians can also take Viagra. They don't have to swalow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.