Food Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock?
→ Because it was marble cake!

What is Dracula's favorite pudding?
→ Leeches and scream.

- Mummy! Mummy! Have you seen my Cabbage Patch Doll?

- Be quiet and finish your coleslaw!

What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven?
→ Angel food cake, of course!

- You can't have any more chocolates tonight. It's not good for you to go to bed on a full stomach.

- Oh, Mum. I promise I'll lay on my side.

Why was the burger thrown out of the Army?
→ He couldn't pass mustard! (muster)

How many blondes does it take to make chocolate chip cookies?
→ 10. One to mix the dough and nine to peel the smarties.
→ Three. . . one to mix the batter and two to squeeze the rabbit.
→ Two. . . one to make batter and one to peel the M&Ms.

"May I take your order?" the waiter asked.

"Yes, how do you prepare your chickens?"

"Nothing special sir," he replied. "We just tell them straight out that they're going to die."

A Pittsburgh steel worker was driving through northern California's apple country.

He stopped at an orchard and asked the owner, "How much are yer apples?"

"All you can pick for one dollar," said the rancher.

"Okay," said the Pennsylvanian. "I'll take two dollars' worth."

What did the cannibal say when he came home and found his wife chopping up a python and a pygmy?
→ Oh no, not snake and pygmy pie again!