Dirty Jokes — most viewed jokes

How can you tell Bill Clinton from a bunch of dead bodies?
→ He's the stiff one.

What's the difference between a blonde and a broom closet?
→ Only two men fit inside a broom closet at once.

In a survey of American women, when asked, "Would you sleep with President Clinton?" 86% replied, "Not again"

Why did Bill go out to sea on an aircraft carrier?
→ To promote off-shore drilling.

Bill Clinton and Al Gore go into a local diner for lunch.
As they read the menu the waitress comes over and askes Clinton, "Are you ready to order?"
Clinton replies, "Yes, I'd like a quickie."
"A quickie?!?" the waitress replies. "Sir, given the current situation of your personal life I don't think that is a good idea.
I'll come back when you are ready to order from the menu."
She walks away.
Gore leans over to Clinton and says, "It's pronounced Quiche."

A woman walks into her accountant's office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes. The accountant says, "Before we begin, I'll need to ask a few questions." He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "What is your occupation?" The woman replies, "I'm a whore." The accountant balks and says, "No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let's try to rephrase that." The woman, "OK, I'm a prostitute." "No, that is still too crude. Try again." They both think for a minute, then the woman states, "I'm a chicken farmer." The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?" "Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year."

How can you tell that the guy who attacked the White house with a plane was insane?
→ He seems to have thought Clinton would be in his own bedroom at night.

What did Hillary tell Bill when the Paula Jones story broke?
→ "You idiot! I told you to let Teddy Kennedy drive her home!"

While participating is the Olympics a young gymnast had her first sexual experience, going to bed with a stunning foreign participant. Upon returning to her hometown, she promptly went to confession. After receiving absolution, the gymnast was so delighted that she did cartwheels down the aisle to the door. Waiting her turn, Old Mrs. Ole said to her friend, "can you believe what Father Johnson is giving for penance? Of all the days for me not to be wearing panties."