Computer Jokes — most viewed jokes

How are you getting on with the Internet?
→ Surf far, so good.

How do whales type e-mails?
→ With their fish fingers.

How do really posh dogs send messages?
→ By predigree-mail.

What do builders use to make websites?
→ Com.crete.

- What did you think of our website?

- A little bit tacky.

How does the vicar explore the Internet?
→ With the church mouse.

How do sheep sign their e-mails?
→ Ewes sincerely.

- Teacher: Don't forget to check the Internet if you have trouble with your homework questions.

- Pupil: It's not the questions I have trouble with, it's the answers.

It seems there was this couple from Minneapolis, Minnesota, who decided to go to Miami Beach for a few days to thaw out during one particularly cold winter. The airlines have crazy frequent flyer rules, and the wife ended up on a flight the day after her husband.

The husband made it down to Florida and arrived at his hotel. Upon getting to his room, he decided to open his laptop and send his wife back in Minneapolis an email. Unfortunately, he didn't notice he had misspelled his wife's email address.

In South Carolina, a widow had just returned from the funeral of her husband, a Methodist pastor of many years, who had been called to glory just a few days earlier. She decided to check her email because she was expecting to hear from relatives and friends. Upon reading the first email, she let out a loud scream, fainted and fell to the floor.

The woman's son rushed into the room and found his mother on the floor. He glanced up at the computer screen and saw the following email message:

To My Loving Wife:
I've just been checked in. Everything has been prepared for your arrival here tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then.
Your Devoted Husband.
P.S. Sure is hot down here.

What did you say to the policeman who spent eight hours on the Internet?
→ Oh give it arrest.