Blonde Jokes — most viewed jokes

What do blondes and cow-pats have in common?
→ They both get easier to pick-up with age.

A blonde goes to a doctor and tells him that both her ears are burnt.

- Sit down and tell me how it happened.

- Well, I was ironing my clothes when I received a phone call, and instead of picking the phone, I picked up the iron and burnt my ear!

- Okay, I see... But that's one ear - what about the other?

- They called again!!

What is a bellybutton for?
→ It gives a blonde a place to park her gum on the way down.

Three women are about to be executed. One's a brunette, one's a redhead and one's a blonde.

The guard brings the brunette forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests.

She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" Suddenly the brunette yells, "EARTHQUAKE!!!" Everyone is startled and throws themselves on the ground while she escapes.

The guard brings the redhead forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She say no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" Suddenly the redhead yells, "TORNADO!!!" Everyone is startled and looks around for cover while she escapes.

By now the blonde has it all figured out. The guard brings her forward and the executioner asks if she has any last requests. She says no and the executioner shouts, "Ready! Aim!" and the blonde yells, "FIRE!!!"

Why don't blondes eat bananas?
→ They can't find the zipper.
→ They cant find the pull tab.

What do you call a dumb blonde behind a steering wheel?
→ An air bag.

Why do blondes have little holes all over their faces?
→ From eating with forks.

Why did the blonde climb over the glass wall?
→ To see what was on the other side.

Why won't they hire a blonde pharmacist?
→ They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.

Two tourists were driving through Louisiana. As they were approaching Natchitoches, they started arguing about the pronunciation of the town. They argued back and forth until they stopped for lunch. As they stood at the counter, one tourist asked the "blonde" employee: "Before we order, could you please settle an argument for us? Would you please pronounce where we are at... VERY SLOWLY?" The blonde girl leaned over the counter and said...

"Burrrrrrrr, Gerrrrrrr, Kiiiiing"