Blonde Jokes — most viewed jokes

What's the difference between a blonde and a computer?
→ You only have to punch information into a computer once!

A blonde walks into the library. She walks up to the counter, SLAMS a book down and screams at the librarian, "This is the WORST book I've ever read!" "It has NO plot and far too many characters!"

The librarian looks up and calmly remarks "So, you're the one who took our phone book..."

How does a blonde hemophiliac treat herself?
→ Acupuncture.

Heard the one about the three blondes that went ice fishing and didn't catch anything?

By the time they cut a hole big enough for the boat to fit in it was time to go home.

Why did the blonde go half way to Norway and then turn around and come home?
→ It took her that long to discover that a 14 inch Viking was a television.

What did the dumb blonde say when told that "Scheherezade" was composed by Rimsky-Korsakov ?
→ "Why'd his mom choose to call him Rimsky of all names ?!!?"

What do you call a blonde in an institution of higher learning?
→ A visitor.

A blonde and a redhead went to the bar after work for a drink, and sat on stools watching the 6 O'clock news. A man was shown threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge, and the blonde bet the redhead $50 that he wouldn't jump.

Sure enough, he jumped, so the blonde gave the redhead $50. The redhead said, "I can't take this, you're my friend."

But the blonde insisted saying, "No. A bet's a bet."

Then the redhead said, "Listen, I have to tell you that I saw this on the 5 O'clock news, so I can't take your money."

The blonde replied, "Well, so did I, but I didn't think he would jump again!"

Why do blondes wear green lipstick?
→ Because red means stop.

A blond guy and a brunette girl were happily married and about to have a baby. One day, the wife started having contractions, so the husband rushed her to the hospital. He held her hand as she went through a trying birth. In the end, there were two little baby boys.

The blond guy turned to his wife and angrily said, "All right, who's the other father!?!"