Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

If you had fifteen cows and five goats what would you have?
→ Plenty of milk!

Why do cows think cooks are mean?
→ They whip cream!

What animals do you bring to bed?
→ Your calves.

Why was the mother flea feeling down in the dumps?
→ Because she thought her children were all going to the dogs.

"Doctor," said the patient, "I need help! I can't stop acting like a cat!"

"How long have you had this problem?" the doctor asked.

"Lest's see," said the patient, "Mom had the litter in '41."

What cat purrs more than any other?
→ Purrsians!

What hair style is a calf's favorite?
→ The cowlick!

What do cows read at the breakfast table?
→ The moospaper!

A guy walks into a laundry run by cats. "Excuse me," he said to the cat in charge, "Can you get milk stains out?"

"Sure," replied the cat. "We'll have that stain licked in a minute!"

How do cats eat spaghetti?
→ The same as everyone else - they put it in their mouths!