Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

What do you say to a twenty ton dinosaur with headphones on?
→ Anything you want. He can't hear you.

What did the dentist see at the North Pole?
→ A molar bear

Why did the farmer feed money to his cow?
→ He wanted rich milk!

- Teacher: Name five things that contain milk.

- Pupil: Butter, cheese, ice cream ... and two cows!

A little girl was playing in the garden when she spied two spiders mating.

"Daddy, what are those two spiders doing?" she asked.

"They're mating," her father replied.

"What do you call the spider on top, Daddy?" she asked.

"That's a daddy long legs," her father answered.

"So, the other one is a mommy long legs?" the little girl asked.

"No," her father replied. "Both of them are daddy long legs."

The little girl thought for a moment, then took her foot and stomped them flat.

"Well, we're not having any of THAT in our garden."

What do you call it when a cat bites?
→ Catnip!

What do rodents say when they play bingo?
→ 'Eyes down for a full mouse'!

A man wanted an Easter pet for his daughter. He looked at a baby chick and a baby duck. They were both very cute, but he decided to buy the baby chick. Do you know why?
→ The baby chick was a little cheeper!

Why do cows like being told jokes?
→ Because they like being amoosed!

What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit?
→ The first herd shot round the world!