Random joke from this category
There once was a snail that wanted to buy a Nissan Z car.
So, he went to a dealership and bought a car. He said to the salesperson:
- But, I would like my car personalized. Would it be possible to have the "Z" replaced with an "S"?
The dealer said yes, and it was done.
And, as the snail raced around the city in his brand new car, everyone would see:
- Wow, look at that S-car-go.
What does a duck like to eat?
→ A quacker!
What do you call someone who sticks his right hand in shark's mouths?
→ Lefty!
What do you call a lion wearing a cravat and a flower in its mane?
→ A dandy lion!
A tourist was being led through the swamps of Florida.
- Is it true - he asked - that an alligator won't attack you if you carry a flashlight?
- That depends - replied the guide - on how fast you carry the flashlight.
If a fly has no wings would you call him a walk?
What do you do when two snails have a fight?
→ Leave them to slug it out.
What is the best advice to give a worm?
→ Sleep late.
What's a skunk's philosophy of life?
→ Eat, stink and be merry!
A man was driving down a quiet country lane when out into the road strayed a rooster. Whack! The rooster disappeared under the car. A cloud of feathers.
Shaken, the man pulled over at the farmhouse, rang the door bell. A farmer appeared. The man, somewhat nervously said:
- I think I killed your rooster, please allow me to replace him.
- Suit yourself - the farmer replied - you can go join the other chickens that are around the back.
