Most viewed jokes

What is the cow's holiday greeting?
→ Mooooory Christmas!

I wouldn't say that Christmas gnomes are cross-eyed, but when they cry the tears run down their back!

What was the real purpose of Bill's college visit to Moscow?
→ To study economics.

How did the chickens dance at the Christmas party?
→ Chick to chick!

What does Father Christmas suffer from if he gets stuck in a chimney?
→ Santa Claustrophobia!

What was so good about he neurotic doll the girl was given for Christmas?
→ It was wound up already.

Why is a cat on a beach like Christmas?
→ Because they both have "Sandy claws"!

A business man called and had a question about the documents he needed in order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I reminded him he needed a visa:

- Oh no I don't, I've been to China many times and never had to have one of those.

I double checked, and sure enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said:

- Look, I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my American Express.

Why does Bill Clinton wear underwear?
→ To keep his ankles warm.

Why did the reindeer wear sunglasses at the beach?
→ Because he didn't want to be recognised!