Most viewed jokes

One day there were these three boys walking down the street, all of a sudden they heard a yell: 'HELP! HELP!'
When the boys got to the noise they saw Bill Clinton in a lake drowning. The three boys saved him from drowning. Bill Clinton asks the first boy how he could ever repay him. The boy said, 'I want a boat.'
The second boy said 'I want a truck.'
And the third boy said, 'I want three tombstones with are names all on them.' Bill Clinton said, 'why is that son?'
The little boy said, 'because when my Dad finds out that we saved you, he is going to kill us all!'

What kind of neckwear does Hillary Clinton look best in?
→ A noose.

How did Bill and Hillary Clinton meet?
→ They were dating the same girl in high school.

What is the difference between Bill Clinton and Jimmy Carter?
→ Jimmy Carter waited until after the inauguration to break his promises.

Why is Chelsea Clinton growing up a confused child?
→ Because dad can't keep his pants on and mom wants to wear them.

Why does the secret service guard Hillary so closely?
→ Because if something happens to her, Bill becomes President!

- Father Christmas: I thought I asked you to go out there and clear the snow!

- I'm on my way, Father Christmas.

- Father Christmas: But you only have one welly on!

- That's all right! There's only one foot of snow!

What's a hairdressers's favourite Christmas song?
→ 'Oh comb all ye faithful'

When asked for her occupation, a woman charged with a traffic violation said she was a schoolteacher. The judge rose from the bench. "Madam, I have waited years for a schoolteacher to appear before this court," he smiled with delight. "Now sit down at that table and write 'I will not pass through a red light' five hundred times."

What was the real purpose of Bill's college visit to Moscow?
→ To study economics.