Most viewed jokes

What did the cat do when he swallowed some cheese?
→ He waited by the mouse hole with baited breath!

- My tummy is getting awfully big, doctor.

- You should diet.

- Really? What color?

A silly boy spent the afternoon with some friends, but when the time came for him to leave, a terrific storm started with thunder, lightning and torrential rain.
'You can't go home in this,' said one of his friends, 'you'd better stay the night.'
'That's very kind of you,' said the boy. 'I'll just run home and get my pyjamas.'

Why do pens get sent to prison?
→ To do long sentences!

What do you call a tired cow?
→ Milked out!

What do you get if you cross a student and an alien?
→ Something from another universe-ity!

Why does Clinton always have a stupid grin on his face?
→ He is stupid!

What bird has wings but cannot fly?
→ Roast turkey!

Mary arrived home from school covered in spots. 'Whatever's the matter?' asked her mother.
'I don't know,' replied Mary, 'but the teacher thinks I may have caught decimals.'

Why does a d dog scratch himself?
→ He is the only one that knows where it itches.