Most viewed jokes

What do you call a group of cattle sent into orbit?
→ The first herd shot round the world!

- Teacher: Name five things that contain milk.

- Pupil: Butter, cheese, ice cream ... and two cows!

What do you call ten Utah State law students standing ear to ear?
→ A wind tunnel.

A bus filled with politicians was driving through the countryside one day, on the campaign trail. The bus driver, caught up in the beautiful scenery, loses control and crashes into the ditch.

A farmer living nearby hears the horrible crash and rushes out to discover the wreckage. Finding the politicians he buries them.

The next day, the police come to the farm to question the man. "So you buried all the politicians?" asked the police officer. "Were they all dead?"

The farmer answered, "Some said they weren't, but you know how politicians lie."

Why is Chelsea Clinton a miracle child?
→ Because lawyers use their personalities for birth control.

Bill, Hillary, and Al are in a boat. The boat sinks.
Who is saved?
→ The United States of America.

- Mother: Let me see your report son.

- Son: Here it is, Mother, but don't show it to Dad. He's been helping me!

My granddaughter came to spend a few weeks with me, and I decided to teach her to sew. After I had gone through a lengthy explanation of how to thread the machine, she stepped back, put her hands on her hips, and said in disbelief, "You mean you can do all that, but you can't operate my Game Boy?"

Why do cats chase birds?
→ For a lark!

What do you call it when a cat bites?
→ Catnip!