Most viewed jokes

- Teacher: What are the Great Plains?

- Pupil: 747, Concorde and F-16!

What's the definition of a good actor?
→ Somebody who tries hard to be everybody but himself.

How do you confuse a man?
→ You don't - they're born that way.

Did you hear about the Finn who spent a fortune building a storm cellar in case there was an earthquake.

The Rocky Mountains are very big and far apart. It takes a long time for an echo to bounce back off one of these mountains.
One night, a camper in the Rockies went to sleep early.
But before climbing into his sleeping bag he yelled:

- Time to get up.

And eight hours later the echo came back and woke him up!

What kind of hair do oceans have?
→ ... Wavy hair.

A boy from France comes to America. He wants to learn some new words so he goes to the airport and learns "take off." Then he learnes "zebra" from the zoo and "baby" from the hospital. Then he goes home and says, "Mommy, I learned new words today." She says, "Great, honey what did you learn?" He says, "Takeoffzebrababy!"

Phoning the florist to order some flowers for her lover's funeral, woman was caught off guard when asked what message she wanted on the card:

- Message? - she sputtered.

- Well, I guess, 'You will be missed.'

Visiting the funeral home, she was pleased that her floral tribute had arrived but mortified that the card had her exact words:

- I guess you will be missed.

What do cows like to line dance to?
→ Any kind of moosic you like!

What is the definition of "derange"?
→ De place where de cowboys ride!