Most viewed jokes

Did you hear about the fool who keeps going round saying "no"?

- No.

- Oh, so it's you!

What do you call a guard with a hundred legs?
→ A sentrypede.

Why is the Liberty Bell like a dropped Easter egg?
→ Because they're both cracked!

Dawn was breaking over the camp grounds.
Tony and Steve were lying in their tent.

- That was a terrible thunder and lightening storm last night, - Tony announced.

Steve turned to him and said:

- Why didn't you wake me up? You know I can't sleep during a storm!

My mother-in-law has got so many double chins it looks like she is peering over a pile of pancakes.

What's another name for an assistant stable cleaner?
→ A co-pile-it!

What disease do horses fear most?
→ Hay Fever!

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?
→ They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins!

A tourist walked into a fish and chip shop in Ireland. "I'll have fish and chips twice," he orders. "Sure, I heard you the first time," came the reply.

How do you tune a fish?
→ With its scales!