Most viewed jokes

Modern Haircuts by Sean Head

Neck Exercises by G. Rarff

Why did the blond lay out on the lawn chair in her bikini at midnight?
→ She wanted to get a dark tan.

Why did the blonde write "TGIF" on her shoes?
→ To remind her that "toes go in first."

What do you call a mother cow that lost her calf?
→ "Decafinated"

The newlyweds were on their honeymoon when the groom asked:

- Honey, you can tell me. Am I the first man?

She looked up and said:

- Why does everybody ask me that?!

Why do women pay so much attention to their appearance rather than to improving their minds?
→ Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.

- Defendant: Your Honor, I want you to appoint me another lawyer.

- Judge: And why is that?

- Defendant: Because the Public Defender isn't interested in my case.

- Judge (to Public Defender): Do you have any comments on the defendant's motion?

- Public Defender: I'm sorry, Your Honor. I wasn't listening.

You might be a redneck if you go to your family reunion to meet women!

A mathematician, an accountant and an economist apply for the same job.

The interviewer calls in the mathematician and asks:

- What do two plus two equal?

The mathematician replies:

- Four.

The interviewer asks:

- Four, exactly?

The mathematician looks at the interviewer incredulously and says:

- Yes, four, exactly.

Then the interviewer calls in the accountant and asks the same question:

- What do two plus two equal?

The accountant says:

- On average, four - give or take ten percent, but on average, four.

Then the interviewer calls in the economist and poses the same question:

- What do two plus two equal?

The economist gets up, locks the door, closes the shade, sits down next to the interviewer and says:

- What do you want it to equal?