Most viewed jokes

Why do Iraqi police officers walk in threes?
→ The first knows how to read, the second knows how to write and the third is to keep an eye on the two intellectuals.

How many US Presidents does it take to screw in a light bulb?
→ None, the constitution says that only Congress can screw in light bulbs, so only Congress is responsible for the dark, which is why we need a Constitutional ammendment.
→ Only one. If he can handle 250000000 people a day I think he can handle screwing one extra lightbulb.

What is the pig's favorite musical instrument?
→ The piggalo (piccalo).

An eight-year-old kid says to his dad:

- When I grow up, I want to be a musician.

The dad says:

- I am sorry -- can't have it both ways.

What kind of star wears sunglasses?
→ A movie star.

Why did the monster get a ticket at Thanksgiving dinner?
→ He was exceeding the feed limit!

Two psychologists meet at their twentieth college reunion. One of them looks like he just graduated, while the other psychologist looks old, worried and withered.
The older looking one asks the other:

- What's your secret? Listening to other people's problems every day, all day long, for years on end, has made an old man of me.

The younger looking one replies:

- Who listens?

- She was two thirds married once.

- What do you mean?

- Well, she turned up, the Minster turned up, but the groom didn't!

- Doctor, doctor, should I surf the Internet on an empty stomach?

- No, you should do it on a computer.

What did you say to the policeman who spent eight hours on the Internet?
→ Oh give it arrest.