Most viewed jokes

Why do bees hum?
→ Because they've forgotten the words!

Carmella and Mario were out on their first date.

- Have you ever read Shakespeare? - asked Carmella.

- No - said Mario.

- Who wrote it?

What is the difference between a horse and a duck?
→ One goes quick and the other goes quack!

What did the city worker say after his first ever pony trek?
→ I never knew anything stuffed with hay could be so hard!

How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites?
→ They take a gallop poll!

What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
→ Toga-ether we can rule the world!

One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes.

She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said:

- what are you supposed to say sweetheart?

The little girl looks up at the woman and says:

- Twick or Tweat!

The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child:

- Go ahead honey say it just one more time.

Once again the little Angel looks up and says:

- Twick or Tweat!

The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag.

The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says:

- Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!

What happens if you eat a hot frog?
→ You'll croak in no time!

Why was the frog down in the mouth?
→ He was un hoppy!

- Helga, tell me something. Why do Swedish men always have stupid grins on their faces?

- Because they're stupid - said her friend.