Most viewed jokes

How can if you have a stupid dog?
→ It chases parked cars!

What did the dog use to make his kite?
→ Flypaper.

Where do you usually find dogs?
→ It all depends on where you lose them.

Why do dogs bury bones in the ground?
→ Because you can't bury them in trees!

What did the angry man sing when he found his slippers chewed up by the new puppy?
→ I must throw that doggie out the window!

Why is being in the military like a blow job?
→ The closer you get to discharge, the better you feel.

A frog goes into the bank and asks the teller for a loan. The teller tells the frog to see Mr. Paddywack, the loan officer.

Mr. Paddywack looks at the frog and says:

- What do you have for collateral?

The frog pulls out of his pocket a solid silver elephant.

Mr. Paddywack looks at the elephant and says:

- I don't know. I'm going to have to ask Mr. Larson, the bank manager to approve this.

He goes into Mr. Larson's office and comes back.

Two minutes later, Mr. Larson comes out with the elephant and says:

- It's a knick-knack Paddywack, give the frog a loan!

Which end of a bus is it best to get off?
→ It doesn't matter. Both ends stop.

My life selling houses by Con Allday

Why don't blondes eat bananas?
→ They can't find the zipper.
→ They cant find the pull tab.