Most viewed jokes

My friend is so stupid he thinks that an autograph is a chart showing sales figures for cars.

Did you hear about the depressed horse?
→ He told a tale of whoa!

- Abraham Lincoln had a very hard childhood, he had to walk 7 miles to school everyday.

- Well he should have got up earlier and caught the school bus like everyone else!

Did you hear about the ghost who enjoyed doing housework?
→ He used to go round with the oooo-ver.

Where do you get frogs' eggs?
→ At the spawn shop!

Several women were discussing what they should have for dinner. "If you're watching your weight," came one suggestion, "those diet frozen dinners are good." The man then added: "But get two. They're small."

What musical instrument goes with cheese?
→ Picklelo.

When fish play football, who is the captain?
→ The team's kipper!

Mother to daughter advice: Cook a man a fish and you feed him for a day. But teach a man to fish and you get rid of him for the whole weekend.

A Brit, a Frenchman and a Russian are viewing a painting of Adam and Eve frolicking in the Garden of Eden.

- Look at their reserve, their calm - muses the Brit.

- They must be British.

- Nonsense - the Frenchman disagrees.

- They're naked, and so beautiful. Clearly, they are French.

- No clothes, no shelter - the Russian points out.

- they have only an apple to eat, and they're being told this is paradise. They are Russian.