A butler came running into his important master's office.
- Sir, sir, there's a ghost in the corridor. What shall I do with him?
Without looking up from his work the master said:
- Tell him I can't see him.
- My brother's on a seafood diet.
- Really?
- Yes, the more he sees food the more he eats.
Two flies were on a cornflakes packet.
- Why are we running so fast? - asked one.
- Because - said the second - it says 'tear along the dotted line'!
What's the difference between a homeless and a pizza?
→ A pizza can feed a family of four.
In February 1994 in New Brighton, Minn., a 32-year-old man and his 24-year-old girlfriend were arrested after a food fight in a grocery store. After arguing loudly, the couple began throwing sweet potatoes at each other. Eventually, the man allegedly threw the woman into several vegetable racks, sending the contents spilling to the floor. As both continued to brawl on the floor, she allegedly stuffed lettuce into the man's mouth.
What kind of money do fishermen make?
→ Net profits!
What do you call an intelligent man in America?
→ A tourist.
What do you call an elephant with a carrot in each ear?
→ Anything you want as he can't hear you!
What's the difference between an elephant and a piece of paper?
→ You can't make a paper aeroplane out of an elephant!
What's grey and never needs ironing?
→ A drip dry elephant!
