Most viewed jokes

What's grey and moves at a hundred miles an hour?
→ A jet propelled elephant!

What kind of dog can you best see in the dark?
→ A glowberman pinscher!

- Doctor, doctor, can I have a bottle of aspirin and a pot of glue?

- Why?

- Because I've been at my computer all day and I've got a splitting headache!

A woman went to the doctor and complained that she was suffering from knee pains:

- Do you indulge in any activity that puts a lot of pressure on your knees? - asked the doctor.

- Every night, my husband and I have sex on the floor doggy style.

- I see - said the doctor.

- You know, there are plenty of other sexual positions?

- Not if you want to watch TV there ain't!

A kid called up his mom from his college and asked her for some money, because he ran out of it. His mom said:

- Sure, sweetie. I'll will send you some money. You also left your calculus book here when you visited 2 weeks ago. Do you want me to send that up too?

- Uhh, oh yeah, okay - responded the kid.

So his mom wrapped the book along with the checks up in a package and went to the post office to mail the money and the book.

When she gets back, her husband asked:

- Well how much did you give the boy his time?

She said:

- Oh, I wrote 2 checks, one for $20 and the other for $1000 out to him.

- That's $1020! - yelled her husband.

- Are you crazy?

- Don't worry, Hon - she said.

- I taped the $20 check to the cover of his book, but I put the $1000 one somewhere between the pages in chapter 19!

Why did the cannibal eat the tightrope walker?
→ He wanted a balanced meal.

What happened when the cannibal got a religion?
→ He only ate Catholics on Fridays!

What song do burgers sing on the job?
→ Gristle While You Work!

What do they say about the noise at the Burger Land Super Bowl?
→ It's PAN-demonium!

Making Snacks by San Widge