Most viewed jokes

It was so hot when we went on holiday last year that we had to take turns sitting in each other's shadow.

A cattleman from West Texas died & went on to the Great Beyond. As he approached the great gate, he noticed that the terrain was bare with no greenery. He remarked to the gate keeper:

- Howdy Saint Peter. Say, this looks just like Texas.

The gatekeeper replied:

- First of all, I'm not Saint Peter and second, you really don't know where you are at all, do you?

Why are brunettes so proud of their hair?
→ It matches their mustaches.

- Customer: Why doesn't my hairline look good?

- Barber: It's on the same old head.

Do Apes kiss?
→ Yes, but never on the first date!

- Mom: Fred, there were two chocolate cakes in the larder yesterday, and now there's only one. Why?

- Fred: I don't know. It must have been so dark I didn't see the other one.

Why are gold fish orange?
→ The water makes them rusty!

What part of a fish weighs the most?
→ It's scales!

A White man explaining to a Mexican man says that there are three words the Mexican needs to know in order to be all right in the city: The White man says these words are: green, pink, and yellow. Then the White man says "Now tell me a sentence using all three words." The Mexican says "I hear de telephona ah greena greena, I pink up de phona and say ah yellow?"

How do we know that Joan of Arc was French?
→ She was maid in France!