Random joke from this category
Who needs a man!...
My dog growls at me every morning, my parrot swears all afternoon, my fireplace smokes a lot, my cat slinks home in the early morning hours, and I have a physician who looks me over regularly.
Gena is such a good wife. Why, just let her husband get home late at night and as soon as he enters the door, he gets his pipe, slippers, pajamas, robe, book, dinner, and if anything else is handy, she heaves that at him, too.
- Marriage counselor: Maybe your problem is that you've been waking up grumpy every morning.
- Client: No, I always let him sleep.
"Okay," said the wife, "I'll admit I like to spend money, but it's the only extravagance I have!"
The husband returns home one day and tells his wife, "Hi honey, look, I've bought the new Rolling Stones CD."
"Why did you do that?! We don't even have a CD player!" replied the wife..
"So what... have I ever asked why you keep on buying bras?"
There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
John looked up to see his mother-in-law walking toward the front door carrying a broom. "Tell me," he said to her, "are you going to clean house with it or fly away on it?"
How many male chauvinistic pigs does it take to change a light bulb?
→ None. Let the bitch do it by herself. or None. Let the bitch cook in the dark.
A job negotiator and a feminist were in dispute... The feminist was arguing over the different pay scales that her women were receiving...
- Fem: Okay, why are women paid less than men for doing the same job that a man does.
- Neg: It says in the Bible that women are worth less than men.
- Fem: Where does it say that? I don't think so.
- Neg: Well, you do agree that woman was made from a rib, correct?
- Fem: Yeah, so?
- Neg: Well, there you have it. A rib is a cheaper cut of meat!
How many men does it take to change a roll of toilet paper?
→ Nobody knows. It has never happened.
