Science — best jokes

Which astronaut wears the biggest helmet?
→ The one with the biggest head.

What does an astronaut do when he gets angry?
→ He blasts off!

What is an astronomer?
→ A night watchman with a college education.

What do you get if you cross a student and an alien?
→ Something from another universe-ity!

What did the alien say when his flying saucer landed in a stud farm?
→ Take me to your breeder!

Where do Martians drink beer?
→ At a mars bar!

Two aliens landed in the remote countryside and went walking from the flying saucer along a narrow lane. The first thing they saw was a red pillar box.

"Take us to your leader," said the first alien.

"Don't waste time talking to him. Can't you see he's only a child?" said the second alien.

Two astronauts were in a space ship circling high above the earth. One had to go on a space walk while the other stayed inside.

When the space walker tried to get back inside the space ship, he discovered that the cabin door was locked, so he knocked.

There was no answer. He knocked again, louder this time. There was still no answer.

Finally he hammered at the door as hard as he could and heard a voice from inside the space ship saying, 'Who's there?'

Why don't astronauts keep their jobs very long?
→ Because as soon as they start they get fired.

Why didn't the astronauts stay on the moon?
→ Because it was a full moon and there was no room.