Kids Jokes — best jokes

What do stupid kids do at Halloween?
→ They carve a face on an apple and go bobbing for pumpkins!

What is a child's favourite type of Halloween candy?
→ Lots a candy.

One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes.

She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said:

- what are you supposed to say sweetheart?

The little girl looks up at the woman and says:

- Twick or Tweat!

The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child:

- Go ahead honey say it just one more time.

Once again the little Angel looks up and says:

- Twick or Tweat!

The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag.

The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says:

- Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my f**king cookies!

Why was the boy unhappy to win the prize for the best costume at the Halloween party?
→ Because he just came to pick up his little sister.

- Knock knock.

- Who's there?

- Boo!

- Boo who?

- Just Boo! I'm a ghost!

What's a doll's favorite food?
→ Barbie-Q!

At a party, a conjurer was producing egg after egg from a little boy's ear.

- There! - he said proudly.

- I bet your Mum can't produce eggs without hens, can she?

- Oh yes, she can - said the boy.

- She keeps ducks.

- Jimmy, how many more times must I tell you to come away from that cookie tin?

- No more, mom. It's empty.

- Boy: What's black, slimy, with hairy legs and eyes on stalks?

- Mom: Eat the cookies and don't worry about what's in the tin.

- Mom: Fred, there were two chocolate cakes in the larder yesterday, and now there's only one. Why?

- Fred: I don't know. It must have been so dark I didn't see the other one.