Dirty Jokes — best jokes

What did Michael Jackson say when his cock slid in the little boys arse?
→ There is a great musician in you.

What's got 400 legs and no pubic hair?
→ The front row of a Hanson concert

Two blondes are passing by a fruit shop when the grocer calls to them, "Bananas! 50 cents each or three for a dollar!"

The girls stop and look at each other. "Well I suppose we could always eat the third one!"

What's the difference between a blonde and a light bulb?
→ Well, the light bulb is smarter, but the blonde is easier to turn on.

What's the difference between a blonde and a shower?
→ The shower has to be turned on before it gets wet.

A blonde named Mary decides to do something really wild. Something she hasn't done before, so she goes out to rent her first X-rated adult video.

She goes to the video store, and after looking around for a while, selects a title that sounds very stimulating.

She drives home, lights some candles, slips into something comfortable, and puts the tape in the VCR.

To her disappointment, there's nothing but static on the screen, so she calls the video store to complain.

"I just rented an adult movie from you and there's nothing on the tape but static," she says.

"Sorry about that. We've had problems with some of those tapes. Which title did you rent?" the clerk replies.

"Head Cleaner," Mary replies.

What did one of the blonde's legs say to the other one?
→ Between you and me we could make a lot of money!

How can you tell if a blonde is a redneck?
→ If she can chew tobacco and suck dick at the same time and still know which one to spit out.

How do you break a blonde's nose?
→ Place a dildo under a glass table!

What did the dumb blond say to the large breasted waitress after reading her name tag?
→ What did you name the other one!!