Dirty Jokes — best jokes

What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
→ Wiped his ass.

How do you embarrass an archeologist?
→ Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
→ Ask your mother.

What can a goose do, a duck can't, and a lawyer should?
→ Stick his bill up his ass.

Why is food better than men?
→ Because you don't have to wait an hour for seconds.

What have men and spray paint in common?
→ One squeeze and they're all over you.

Why do men always give their penis a name?
→ Because they don't want a stranger making 95 percent of their decisions for them.

What is the difference between a woman in church and a woman in a bathtub?
→ One has hope in her soul, the other has soap in her hole.

What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
→ A Lickalotopus.

What do you call a gay dinosaur?
→ Mega-sore-ass.