Business Jokes — best jokes

What does an accountant use for birth control?
→ His personality.

What do actuaries do to liven up their office party?
→ Invite an accountant.

Why do some accountants decide to become actuaries?
→ They find bookkeeping too exciting.

What's an actuary?
→ An accountant without the sense of humour.

Why did God invent economists?
→ So accountants could have someone to laugh at.

When does a person decide to become an accountant?
→ When he realises he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.

What's the definition of a good tax accountant?
→ Someone who has a loophole named after him.

What's the definition of an accountant?
→ Someone who solves a problem you didn't know you had in a way you don't understand.

How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?
→ "What kind of answer did you have in mind?"
→ Two, one to change the light bulb and one to check that it was done within the given budget.

What is a Budget?
→ An orderly system for living beyond your means.