School — most viewed jokes

Boy to Friend: I'm sorry, I won't be able to go out after school. I promised Dad that I would stay in and help him with my homework.

One day our professor was discussing a particularly complicated concept. A pre-med student rudely interrupted to ask, "Why do we have to learn this pointless information"

"To save lives." the professor responded quickly and continued the lecture.

A few minutes later, the same student spoke up again. "So how does physics save lives?" he persisted.

"It keeps the ignoramuses like you out of medical school," replied the professor.

What did King Arthur sleep with when he was afraid of the dark?
→ A knight light

- You've failed history again!

- Well you always told me to let bygones be bygones!

Who invented King Arthur's round table?
→ Sir Circumference!

A little girl came home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."

The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this ... by the way, what was it that you didn't do?"

The little girl replied, "My homework."

Fred came home from his first day at school.
"Nothing exciting happened", he told his mother, "Except the teacher didn't know how to spell cat so I told her"

An ideal homework excuse

- Teacher: Where is your homework?

- Pupil: I left it in my shirt and my mother put it in the washing machine

Why did the music student have a piano in the bathroom?
→ Because he was practicing Handel's Water Music.

What did Caesar say to Cleopatra?
→ Toga-ether we can rule the world!