Language Jokes — most viewed jokes

Why English Teachers Are Important: The Words are the same. Only the punctuation changes...

Dear Thomas,
I want a man who knows what love is all about. You are generous, kind, thoughtful. People who are not like you admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me for other men. I yearn for you. I have no feelings whatsoever when we're apart. I can be forever happy--will you let me be yours?
Maria

Dear Thomas,
I want a man who knows what love is. All about you are generous, kind, thoughtful people, who are not like you. Admit to being useless and inferior. You have ruined me. For other men, I yearn. For you, I have no feelings whatsoever. When we're apart, I can be forever happy. Will you let me be? Yours,
Maria

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aardvark!

- Aardvark who?

- Aardvark a hundred miles for one of your smiles!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Aaron!

- Aaron who!

- Aaron on the side of caution!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Acid!

- Acid who?

- Acid down and be quiet!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Ada!

- Ada who?

- Ada burger for lunch!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Adam!

- Adam who?

- Adam if I do and adam if I don't!

What do you call a telephone call from one vicar to another?
→ A parson to parson call!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Cindy

- Cindy who?

- Cindy next one in please!

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Caesar

- Caesar who?

- Caesar quickly before she gets away!

What county in Ireland hates "South Park?"
→ Killkenny.

Collection Litter by Phil D Basket

The Hurricane by Rufus Blownoff

• George Bush: When you rearrange the letters: He Bugs Gore
• Dormitory: When you rearrange the letters: Dirty Room
• Evangelist: When you rearrange the letters: Evil's Agent
• Desperation: When you rearrange the letters: A Rope Ends It
• The Morse Code: When you rearrange the letters: Here Come Dots
• Slot Machines: When you rearrange the letters: Cash Lost in Em
• Animosity: When you rearrange the letters: Is No Amity
• Mother-in-law: When you rearrange the letters: Woman Hitler
• Snooze Alarms: When you rearrange the letters: Alas No More Z's
• A Decimal Point: When you rearrange the letters: I'm a Dot in Place
• The Earthquakes: When you rearrange the letters: That Queer Shake
• Eleven plus two: When you rearrange the letters: Twelve plus one
• President Clinton of the USA: It can be rearranged into: To Copulate he finds

- Knock Knock

- Who's there?

- Bug

- Bug who?

- Bug Rodgers!