Blonde Jokes — most viewed jokes

How would a blonde punctuate the following? "Fun fun fun worry worry worry"
→ Fun period fun period fun NO PERIOD worry worry worry!

How does a blonde part their hair?
→ (Action of scissoring legs apart)
→ By doing the splits.

What does a blonde and a turtle have in common?
→ If either one of them end up on there back they are both f*cked.

What did the blonde do when she got her period?
→ Looked around for the bastard that must have shot her?

Which is harder to make? A blonde, brunette or a red-headed snowman?
→ A blonde, because you have to hollow out its head.

Why did god give blonds 2% more brains than horses?
→ Because he didn't want them shitting in the streets during parades.

- We need to get these people to a hospital!

- What is it?

- It's a big building with a lot of doctors, but that's not important now.

What do you call a blonde with ESP and PMS?
→ A know-it-all bitch.

Why did the blonde keep a empty carton of milk in the fridge?
→ In case she wanted black coffee.

Shortly after the 911 emergency number became available, an elderly and quite ill blonde appeared in a Rochester hospital emergency room, having driven herself to the hospital and barely managing to stagger in from the parking lot.

The horrified nurse said, "Why didn't you call the 911 number and get an ambulance?"

The lady replied, "My phone doesn't have an eleven!"