Animal Jokes — most viewed jokes

Is the squirt from an elephants trunk very powerful?
→ Well, a jumbo jet can keep 500 people oin the air for hours at a time!

What do elephants use for tampons?
→ Sheep.

Why did the python do national service?
→ He was coiled up!

This fundamentalist Christian couple felt it important to own an equally fundamentally Christian pet. So, they went shopping.
At a kennel specializing in this particular breed, they found a dog they liked quite a lot. When they asked the dog to fetch the Bible, he did it in a flash. When they instructed him to look up Psalm 23, he complied equally fast, using his paws with dexterity. They were impressed, purchased the animal, and went home (piously, of course).
That night they had friends over. They were so proud of their new fundamentalist dog and his major skills, they called the dog and showed off a little.
The friends were impressed, and asked whether the dog was able to do any of the usual dog tricks, as well. This stopped the couple cold, as they hadn't thought about "normal" tricks.

- Well - they said - let's try this out.

Once more they called the dog, and they clearly pronounced the command:

- Heel!

Quick as a wink, the dog jumped up, put his paw on the man's forehead, closed his eyes in concentration, and bowed his head.

What do rabbits put in their computers?
→ Hoppy disks!

Which fly captured the ladybird?
→ The dragon-fly.

What is a spiders favourite TV show?
→ The newly web game!

What kind of bee can keep an aeroplane dry?
→ An aero-drone!

What does the bee Santa Claus say?
→ Ho hum hum!

How do jockeys determine which racehorses are the favourites?
→ They take a gallop poll!