A man called the undertaker one afternoon and sobbed:
- Come and bury my wife.
- But I buried your wife ten years ago - replied the undertaker.
- I got married again - the man sobbed.
- Oh - said the undertaker. - Congratulations.
Two men are discussing their lives. One says:
- I'm getting married. I'm tired of a messy apartment, dirty dishes, and no clothes to wear.
The other one says:
- I'm getting divorced for the same reasons.
What is the title of the new Vietnamamese cookbook?
→ 100 way to wok your dog.
What is grey and comes in quarts?
→ An Elephant.
A blonde walks into an appliance store and says I would like to buy that T.V. please. The store clerk replies Im sorry, we dont do business with blondes. So she stormed off back to her house and dyed her hair black. The next day, she went back to the same store and said I would like to buy that T.V. please. The store clerk, once again, replies Sorry, we dont do business with blondes. The blonde replied How did you know I was blonde? The clerk says Because thats a microwave, not a T.V.
Where do you get frogs eggs?
→ At the spawn shop!
Yo mama's so stupid she can't pass a blood test.
What did one lesbian frog say to the other lesbian frog?
→ MMmmmm, tastes like chicken!
How did Bill and Hillary Clinton first meet?
→ They were both dating the same girl in high school.
How can you tell if your girlfriend is frigid?
→ When you open her legs the lights go on.
