Most viewed jokes

When's the best time to take your doberman pinscher for a walk?
→ Anytime he wants to go.

- Camp Doctor: Your cough sounds better today!

- Camper: It should, I practised all night!

A knight and his men returned to their castle after a hard day of fighting.

- How are we faring? - asked the king.

- Sire! - replied the knight - I have been robbing and pillaging on your behalf all day, burning the towns of your enemies to the west.

- What? - shrieked the king - I don't have any enemies to the west!

- Oh! - said the knight - Well, you do now.

What did the monster say when he saw a rush hour train full of passengers?
→ Oh good! A chew chew train!

Romantic Remembrance by Valentine Card

What's a blondes idea of natural childbirth?
→ No make-up.

One day a blonde, red-head, and a brunette were driving through the desert when all of a sudden their car broke down. They decided they would all walk to civilization.

The red-head said:

- I'm going to take water so if I get thirsty I can drink it.

Then the brunette said:

- I'm going to take some food so if I get hungry I can eat.

And then the blonde said:

- I'm going to take the car door, so if I get hot, I can roll the window down!

If a blonde and a brunette were falling off a building, who would hit the ground first?
→ The brunette because the blonde would stop for directions.

What does a clam do on his birthday?
→ He shellabrates!

WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the morning and see something really scary (whose species and or name you can't remember).