Most viewed jokes

- Who gave the Liberty Bell to Philadelphia?

- Must have been a duck family.

- A duck family?

- Didn't you say there was a quack in it!

What's a fresh vegetable?
→ One that insults a farmer.

What cheese is made backwards?
→ Edam.

One day, two guys Joe and Bob were out fishing. A funeral service passes over the bridge they're fishing by, and Bob takes off his hat and puts it over his heart. He does this until the funeral service passes by.

Joe then said:

- Gee Bob, I didn't know you had it in you!

Bob then replies:

- It's the least I could do. After all I was married to her for 30 years.

How many Germans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
→ Ve are asking ze qvestions here!
→ Two, one to give the order that the bulb be changed and one to screw it in.

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?

These two newfies are building a house. One of them is putting on the siding. He picks up a nail, hammers it in. Picks up another nail, throws it away. Picks up a nail, hammers it in. Picks up another, throws it away. This goes on for a while, and finally his friend comes over and asks him why he is throwing half of the nails away.

He replies:

- Those ones were pointed on the wrong end.

The buddy gets exasperated and says:

- You idiot, those nails are for the other side of the house!

An old Indian lined up all of his 10 little Indian sons and stood in front of them.

He then asked:

- Who push port-a-potty over cliff?

Nobody answered him.

He then asked again:

- Who push port-a-potty over cliff?

Again nobody answered.

The old Indian said:

- I tell story of Georgie and Georgie father. Georgie chop down cherry tree. Georgie tell truth, Big Georgie no punish.

So the Indian asked again:

- Who push port-a-potty over cliff?

To which the littlest Indian replied:

- I push port-a-potty over cliff.

The old Indian then shakes and spanks him, for his punishment. When he is done, the little Indian asks:

- Georgie tell truth, Georgie no get punish. I tell truth, I get punished. Why you punish, father?

The old Indian replied:

- Big Georgie not in cherry tree when it got chopped down!!!

How do writers send e-mail?
→ On the Inkernet.

How do mountainers send messages?
→ By ski-mail.