Yo Mama Jokes — best jokes

Your momma is so fat when she fell in the Grand Canyon she got stuck half way down

Yo mama so greasy she used bacon as a band-aid!
Yo mama so greasy she sweats Crisco!
Yo mama so greasy Texaco buys Oil from her

Yo mama has one leg and a bicycle.
Yo mama has 4 eyes and 2 pair of sunglasses.
Yo mama has so much hair on her upper lip, she braids it.
Yo mama has one hand and a Clapper.
Yo mama has green hair and thinks she's a tree.
Yo mama has one ear and has to take off her hat to hear what you're saying.
Yo mama has 10 fingers--all on the same hand.
Yo mama has a glass eye with a fish in it.
Yo mama has a short leg and walks in circles.
Yo mama has a short arm and can't applaude.
Yo mama has so many freckles she looks like a hamburger!
Yo mama has three fingers and a banjo.
Yo mama has a wooden leg with a kickstand on it.
Yo mama has a bald head with a part and sideburns.
Yo mama has a wooden leg with branches.
Yo mama has so many teeth missing, it looks like her tounge is in jail.

Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio
Yo mama so skinny she has to wear a belt with spandex.
Yo mama so skinny she turned sideways and dissapeared.

Yo mama so lazy she thinks a two-income family is where yo daddy has two jobs.
Yo mama so lazy she's got a remote control just to operate her remote!
Yo mama so lazy that she came in last place in a recent snail marathon.

Yo mama head so small she use a tea-bag as a pillow.
Yo mama head so small that she got her ear pierced and died.

Yo mama so hairy you almost died of rugburn at birth!
Yo mama so hairy she look like she got Buchwheat in a headlock.
Yo mama so hairy Bigfoot is taking her picture!
Yo mama so hairy she wears a Nike tag on her weave so now everybody calls her Hair Jordan.

Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent!
Yo mama so dark she spits chocolate milk!
Yo mama so dark she went to night school and was marked absent.
Yo mama so dark that she can leave fingerprints on charcoal.
Yo mama so dark she has to wear white gloves when she eats Tootsie Rolls to keep from eating her fingers.

Yo mama so short she poses for trophies!
Yo mama so short you can see her feet on her drivers lisence!
Yo mama so short she has to use a ladder to pick up a dime.
Yo mama so short she can play handball on the curb.
Yo mama so short she does backflips under the bed.
Yo mama so short she models for trophys.

Yo mama so nasty she made speed stick slow down.
Yo mama so nasty she brings crabs to the beach.
Yo mama so nasty she made right guard turn left.
Yo mama so nasty the fishery be paying her to leave
Yo mama so nasty she has to creep up on bathwater.
Yo mama so nasty that pours salt water down her pants to keep her crabs fresh.
Yo mama so nasty I called her to say hello, and she ended up giving me an ear infection.