Women Jokes — best jokes

How is a woman like a condom?
→ Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick.

Whats the difference between premenstrual tension and BSE?
→ One's mad cow disease, the other's an agricultural problem.

Why did God create women?
→ To carry semen from the bedroom to the toilet.

I love the lines men use to get us into bed.
"Please, I'll only put it in for a minute." What am I, a microwave?

Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
→ They don't have balls to scratch.

Why do women have tits?
→ So men will talk to them.

What does a 75-year-old woman have between her breasts that a 25-year-old doesn't?
→ Her navel.

What are the small bumps around a woman's nipples for?
→ It's Braille for 'Suck here.'

Whats the difference between a 90s woman and a computer?
→ A 90s woman won't accept a three-and-a-half-inch floppy.

How are women and rocks alike?
→ You skip across the flat ones.