Travel Jokes — best jokes

How to predict weather in Seattle: If you can see Mt Ranier, it's going to rain. If not, it already is.

A postcard home: The weather is here. Wish you were beautiful.

Two Viking invaders are trudging up the beach in the pouring rain. One looks skywards and says, "So this is England. What's it like?" The other snarls, "Well, if you like the weather, you'll love the food."

Why is it so wet in Great Britain?
→ Because of all the kings and queens that reigned (rained) there.

Why do you never see zebras or antelopes at Victoria Station?
→ Because it's a 'mane-lion' station!

What is a twip?
→ A twip is what a wabbit takes when he wides a twain.

Well-known lodging chain announced it was creating a line of no-frills hotels. The only way you'll see a chocolate on the pillow now is if the last guest was eating an M&M.

How can you tell elephants love to travel?
→ They are always packing their trunk!

"I can't believe it," said the tourist. "I've been here an entire week and it's done nothing but rain. When do you have summer here?"

"Well, that's hard to say," replied the local. "Last year, it was on a Wednesday."

What do you get if you cross a sheep with a holiday resort?
→ The Baaahaaamaaas!