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With four daughters and one son always dashing to school activities and part-time jobs, our schedule was hectic.

To add to this, we kept running out of household supplies.

I instructed them all to let me know when they used the last of any item by writing it down on a note pad on the refrigerator.

As a reminder, I wrote at the top:

- IF WE ARE OUT OF IT, WRITE IT DOWN.

When I checked the pad a few days later, to my delight I found the following message:

- MOM, YOU MAY BE A BIT OLD-FASHIONED, BUT YOU ARE NOT 'OUT OF IT.'

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A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write a letter to the Lord requesting the $100.

When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to the Lord, USA, they decided to send it to President Clinton. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5.00 bill, as this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.

The little boy was delighted with the $5.00, and sat down to write a thank-you note to the Lord. It said:

Dear Lord, Thank you very much for sending me the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, DC and as usual, those jerks deducted $95.

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A psychiatrist was conducting a group therapy session with four young mothers and their small children.

- You all have obsessions - he observed.

To the first mother he said:

- You are obsessed with eating. You even named your daughter Candy.

He turned to the second mom.

- Your obsession is money. Again, it manifests itself in your child's name, Penny.

He turned to the third mom.

- Your obsession is alcohol and your child's name is Brandy.

At this point, the fourth mother got up, took her little boy by the hand and whispered:

- Come on sweety, let's go home.

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