Best jokes

It was so hot today I saw a robin picking earthworms out of the ground with a pair of tongs.

What happens when the fog lifts in California?
→ UCLA.

How to predict weather in Seattle: If you can see Mt Ranier, it's going to rain. If not, it already is.

First cave man to 2nd cave man: "I don't care what you say. We never had such unusual weather before they started using bows and arrows."

- Hey, what's the weather like out there?

- I don't know. I'll tell you when it clears.

Why did the lady go out doors with her purse open? Because she expected some change in the weather.

There's a technical term for a sunny, warm day which follows two rainy days. It's called Monday.

A postcard home: The weather is here. Wish you were beautiful.

Two Viking invaders are trudging up the beach in the pouring rain. One looks skywards and says, "So this is England. What's it like?" The other snarls, "Well, if you like the weather, you'll love the food."

There was a communist named Rudolph. One day he looked out the window and said, "It looks like a storm is coming." "No it isn't," said his wife. "Besides, how would you know?"
"Because," he responded, "Rudolph the Red knows rain, dear."