Best jokes

A Soviet journalist walks into the hospital and tells the desk nurse:

- I want to see the eye-ear doctor.

- There is no such doctor - she tells him.

- Perhaps you would like to see someone else?

- No, I need to see an eye-ear doctor - he says.

- But there is no such doctor - she replies.

- We have doctors for the eyes and doctors for the ear, nose and throat, but no eye-ear doctor.

No help. He repeats:

- I want to see the eye-ear doctor.

They go around like this for a few minutes and then the nurse says:

- Comrade, there is no eye-ear doctor, but if there were one, why would you want to see him?

- Because - he replies.

- I keep hearing one thing and seeing another.

A shy guy goes into a bar and sees a beautiful woman sitting at the bar. After an hour of gathering up his courage, he finally goes over to her and asks tentatively:

- Would you mind if I chatted with you for a while?

To which she responds by yelling, at the top of her lungs:

- No, I won't sleep with you tonight!

Everyone in the bar is now staring at them. Naturally, the guy is hopelessly and completely embarrassed and he slinks back to his table. After a few minutes, the woman walks over to him and apologizes. She smiles at him and says:

- I'm sorry if I embarrassed you. You see, I'm a journalist and I've got an assignment to study how people respond to embarrassing situations.

To which he responds, at the top of his lungs:

- What do you mean $200?

George W. Bush is seen crossing the Potomac river on foot.

The Washington Post: "President Bush crosses the Potomac River".
The Washington Time: "Bush's conservative approach saves taxpayers a boat".
Mother Jones: "Bush can't swim".

What do internet football fans sing?
→ E we go E we go, E we go!

Who's the chief of the internet?
→ E-ronimo!

Who writes all his plays on the Internet?
→ Will-e. Shakespeare.

Who looks after the EuroDisney website?
→ Mick e-mouse.

Who is the most popular wizard on the Internet?
→ Har e-potter.

Which of the seven dwarfs use the Internet?
→ Happ-e, Sleep-e, Grump-e, Dope-e and Sneez-e.

What has long ears, hops and likes websurfing?
→ The e-aster bunny.